Barbara Carlin (June Lockhart) is a bit like Tom Sawyer (or various
superheroes), seeing as we first meet her when she’s attending her own funeral,
incognito under a nice black veil that’ll fool everybody she knows and loves (or
hates), of course. Apparently, a stable with her inside burned down under
somewhat suspicious circumstances. It’s just that she wasn’t actually at the
family mansion at the time, so the burned-up female body must belong to somebody
else.
Instead of visiting the police once she learns what has occurred, Barbara
decides to take the matter of cracking this case on her own, trying to surprise
a confession out of her friends and relatives by just turning up at everyone’s
place after her funeral. Given what we later get to see of the way the local
police operates, her plan’s probably the safer bet to come to the truth of the
matter. So we get to meet the family when Barbara first makes herself known to
the always dependable family lawyer Mike (Hugh Beaumont), then her sort of (it’s
complicated, so we get our first flashback) sister Rusty (Cathy O’Donnell), her
shiftless and shifty estranged husband Rod (Mark Daniels), her basically
brain-dead (but hot if you’re into idiots, apparently) boxer lover George (Greg
McClure) who once was Rusty’s boxer lover before Barbara got between them – for
Rusty’s own good, of course. Flashbacks and a lot of wisecracking ensue, until
the murderer tries to do Barbara in again.
Going by the title and the classically noir beginning (as shot by the great
John Alton, no less), you’d expect the film (a PRC productions, purveyors of the
finest noir on Poverty Row) to continue as some Woolrich-style weird mystery,
but once Barbara unmasks herself to Mike and starts to go through all the
suspects she knows (basically everyone she ever met), the whole thing plays out
more as a comedy, with our heroine wisecracking and tough-talking through the
mystery, and the generally sarcastic tone of the dialogue making mincemeat of
all of the film’s melodramatic pretensions. And this isn’t a case of the film
being unintentionally funny – the dialogue as well as the characterisation
border on open satire of the non-genre of the noir, populated as the film is by
people like “neurotic” sister Rusty who does all of the Freudian psychobabble
you’ll find in noir but hilarious, or George who isn’t just a tool but an actual
comedic idiot. All of this does of course weaken the dramatic impact of the
film’s various melodramatic conniptions; but then, I don’t believe for one
moment the film as directed by the sometimes great Bernard Vorhaus wants its
audience to find them anything but sardonically funny.
It’s a pretty great comedy too, with Lockhart (who has all the best lines)
cracking wise and taking names for most of the film, making Rod’s lack of open
infatuation with her the most improbable part of the film. Of course, the film
has a final scene where Barbara is supposed to be willing to put the household
into Rod’s hands and he babbles something about from now on “taking good care of
her”, but everything we’ve seen before does make this sound like the film going
“yes, yes, yes, propriety must be restored, the censors and such” at the
audience instead of meaning anything of what it just said. The viewers have,
after all, met Barbara and her husband.
Before this supposed happy end, the film’s final act does step away from the
comedy a bit (but not so far as not to have fun having its way way the police
and especially their star criminologist), and does get up to some actually
thrilling noir business, with some tightly directed suspense (that’s still based
on the police being so comically stupid, even Rod turns out to be a
better detective than any of them are) whose impact is greatly enhanced by
Alton’s standard tricks working well with Vorhaus’s sense of timing.
It’s a great little film, really, even though it’s not the one its title
suggests.
Sunday, August 11, 2019
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