The Science!? 11: Eegah (1962)

Roxy Miller (Marylin Manning) is driving through the desert one night when a gigantic, club-wielding caveman, who -as we'll learn later- is called Eegah (Richard Kiel), appears before her. Only tactical fainting (and believe me, this won't be the last time she's going to faint) and the sound of her car's horn save her from some sweet sweet caveman-lovin'.
To my great surprise both her boyfriend Tom (Arch Hall jr., who can't sing and can't act, just like Jennifer Lopez) and her father (director, writer and producer Arch Hall sr.) believe her, when she tells her story. Her father goes even further. If there is something like a giant still alive, he has to find and see him. So he charters a helicopter to fly him into the desert, where he promptly meets Eegah. Eegah doesn't clobber him, instead he drags the poor bastard into his cave (incidentally a cave in good old Bronson Canyon, the same cave acting as Ro-Man's home in Robot Monster). When the helicopter can't return to the desert at the promised time, Roxy and Tom jump into Tom's dune buggy to come to the old idiot's rescue. Soon Eegah abducts the girl. What follows are scenes of Arch Hall jr. trotting through well known landscapes, spiced up with scenes from Eegah's cave, where Mister Miller and his daughter try their best to distract Eegah from the sweet feelings that are swelling in his breast (at least he brings flowers this time).
After a long, long time father, daughter and useless boyfriend escape and return to the big city.
Not even the mummified bodies of his ancestors can comfort Eegah, so he wanders off into the city (which suddenly seems to be about a minute away from his home) to find the love of his life again. We all know how this must end.
Oh, Eegah, where have you been all my life? This wonderful, wonderful picture really has everything one can ask for from a bad movie: Bronson Canyon! The sweet memory of Robot Monster! Ray Dennis Steckler in a small role! Dialogue so stupid you can't help but be completely enthralled. A script full of those little details (mummified ancestors, sulphuric water as the reason for Eegah's existence etc etc) that make all the difference between a merely bad movie and the kind of bad movie the connoisseur cherishes and loves.
Even better is the acting. I am completely at a loss to decide who gives the worst performance - Junior? Senior? Marylin Manning? The mighty Eegah? Still, no none is lackluster or disinterested, everybody gives his enthusiastic best, even if it may not be all that much.
Junior's musical numbers (and his bizarre face contortions when he performs) are just the icing on this sweet mess of a cake. Why can't every film be Eegah?